‌Antisanta

Ring Ring Ring Ring Who’s there? Santa.

Santa who? Santa’s claws. ho

ho ho.

I announce myself, all fancy like, in this gnattering cold! My fire pert red robin breast

All fur and feathers and glue

Fringed with wintry down White as OMO, soft as spit.

A rubble brick lead-heavy load

a hood full of head and pink wet snout (as if sneezing)

snot snot snot

From my face

A jagged frostbit thorn

Hangs smoking from a crust-tipped lip.

My breath and beard

is a dry builder’s breakfast plate Rind, ash, sauce and sugar licked

licked licked

Licked till bone-thin Squeaks and whines A string of deers

And a neck out front Rudolf

From whose harness hangs a crusted yoke Of needle holly and pin berries

itchy itchy itchy

A red custard sky oozes Its black sauce

And the drunk night crashes home.

I boot up and slap hard the bony hinds That drag the rusty sleigh

That pulls our arses toward Apollo and tomorrow while below

below below

(Singing)

Oer Mr Softee’s ices we slip and tinkle

A dripping cloud of breakfast, bone, snot and berries Through the stars’ electric twinkle

A murky host of fat babies, goats, scales and everything

and every kid in every home at every hearth in every bed will sing

(Chorus)

Antisanta flies tonight Sleep

Or Santa’s claws will shred my bed tonight Sleep

Or Santa’s breath will fog my head tonight Sleep

for Antisanta flies tonight

February 3, 2016